Past tense now Present

I was created.

From the void one minute. To reality the next. I knew there was a plan, there had to be. I was part of that plan! Everyone said I was. I found out there are many sides to every plan. And there are some sides no one wants to play. I was never asked.

I am created.

I sat in silence.

Never wanting the moment to end. Never quite believing I was there. Never wanting to embarrass myself by screaming in joy! In terror of moving and scaring the dream away. But I did and it did.

I sit in silence.

I walked alone.

Then you walked with me. And I found the journey a wonderment! Every step, every hill, every valley, a new experience somewhere to look forward to.

Then you decided to walk somewhere else. Then I found bitter ground. On every inch of foot, blisters.

I walk alone.

I was without friend.

Then you befriended me. And I found support for my burdens. Sounding board for my thoughts. Heartfelt corrections to my mistakes. Brotherhood in my darkness.

Then you decided to befriend someone else. Then I found frenemies. The great distrust of the outstretched hand.

I am without friend.

I was loved.

I was told I was missed. I was told I was desired. I was told I was special. I was told I was important. I was told I was to die for. I was told I could not be lived without. I was praised by family and lovers alike. I was lied to repeatedly.

I'm never loved.

Few things hurt more than to lose. Few April's are worse than an April Fool. Few things are more evil than to carelessly send someone back. And few of even you feel anything at all while doing any of these. No indictment of anything grandiose. Just a rebuke of humanity in general.