A Natural Born

Post #399.

My days are a cacophony of voices that want to be heard on #400. But today on 399 one of them kicked in the door grabbed me by the scruff of my shirt and said:

"Look, you know who I am! You know what I am here for! Now get with the write'n and write what I say!"

Yes, it would seem that one of my voices is a 1940s gangster. So I'm write'n I'm write'n... 

~~~~~

I am a natural born

I've been called a narcissist by a ninny. I've been called a ninny by a bigamist. I've been called a bigamous by a sinner. I've been called a sinner by an asshole. And I've been called an asshole by many.

But I've never been called by what I am, I am a natural born. 

It's hard to explain that to most. The thought of it frightens some. The implications are beyond the grasp of the rest. It is neither good nor bad. But it can be said that it is difficult to live by, being a natural born. 

Listening to the squabbles of the masses and how the ebb and flow of their hatred fears and prejudices push them one way or the other in a never ending war that they don't seem to realize has been waged since the dawn of the Sun. But then to sit down and remember. It has nothing to do with me. But I will have to deal with it. No one will ask me. But I will have to answer. Best to stay in my little hole and watch them destroy each other. But is that the destiny of a natural born? 

I want to share. I've done that here. But there's so many more creations that I am capable of. I want to have the discourse that I have been trained to have. I want to tell the story of the universe. The unknown  ins and outs of the multiverse. To sing a song where it's the notes that matter not the words. To paint a picture and then like a blind man have someone tell me the wonders that they see. To me this feels like a better way. To create, to teach, to learn, to share, to be a natural born. 

But I've learned and said many times this is not the place to be born. It's not just the news channel that you can turn on and see this. To the everyday the born are mirrors. And the people who look into them will treat you as they see themselves. When was the last time you ever looked at your mirror and saw anything but you. Ask yourself what does a natural born look like? What does it take to be a natural born? 

Cheaper than discount family therapy. Stronger then the strongest drug. Able to leap tall buildings when no one's around. Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird it's a rose on a plane! No, it's just a natural born. For truth, justice, punishment, and pain, mild mannered, hard working, without a newspaper. Fighting the never ending battle to be seen as only a natural born. 

May I sit here with you? Hide from my reality for just a moment? I just need a moment before I have to go back and deal with the they, them, it's, you know the ones who throw titles around. Who are never yet to open a dictionary to understand the words that they utter. Oh, how their incomprehensible speech is like rape to the ear of a natural born. 

On sunny days I laugh and remember. On other days I cry to forget. It's a colorful tapestry even if some of the colors fade while others run. To the born, we only paint what we see. And what we see is not guaranteed to be beauty to anyone. I'm trying to live up to the code. I'm trying to only see what they will think is beautiful. But that's not one of the things that is allowed to a natural born. 

I am not your mirror! I am not the lie your eyes tell you, you see. I am not your scapegoat. I am not your svengali. I am not your burglar. I am not your lover. I am everything that you could only wish to know but never understand.  I am real, I am James, I am a natural born! 

If you only knew. If you only could. If you only trust. If you only listened. If you only tried. If is a word that is infinitely large but infinitely weightless. It is a word that the born can overcome and manipulate to their hearts content. We do not reboot, recast, reimagine. We are infinite. We can tell a story of wonders as though it's true, because it is and we can see it. Ray Bradbury eat your heart out. I am a Natural Born!

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I had tea with the Queen of hearts, no that's not really smart. 

Playing with the Queen of hearts. Knowing it an't really smart. I'm a joker and the only fool that will do anything for you.

10 points to the wise soul who knows the reference.