Hate

I am not one of the shiny brights. Nor one of the gifted lights of beautiful petals. Not one of the blessed chosen.

No, not one of the ignorant bunglers of faith. Blind reciter's. Singing non-thinkers. Unaware lucky ones.

I am the forgotten. The excess. The ever necessary unwanted. The pillar of the ground you walk on.

Silent servant to the gifted. Janitorial staff to the blessed. Mute security at the party. Background clutter, ambiance.

And I am growing to hate. I am filling as the repository of the truth gone bitter. My downcast eyes contain the pain, the loathing, the sorrow, beyond what you imagine.

I've lost my home. I've lost my dream. I've lost my place to hang my hat. I am beginning to wish you to lose yours.

Long into the past this reality arrived from the future. It all seems so familiar. Is this how it's played out for a millennia? Are we all truly just repeating wave particles in the quantum sea?

And every time the energy plays across my wave, have I always played this part? Am I growing with the cumulative pain of the replays? Or did my pain grow in one recording?

Is this hell? I am not one of the shining bright lights and I am growing to hate. And the chosen in their ignorant shells watch from their decadent debauched windows. They watch with their secret arousal. Waiting for it all to burn down around their oh so deserving necks.

What I fear you would never comprehend. You are bright and chosen you only know the pain that you are told hurts. You surrendered your thoughts and free will long ago to the fantasy that you accept as reality. Yet what I fear cares little for either of us.

I was trained in the arts. I was taught the science. I prayed in the church, and I broke bread at the table. I played my part. And yet I was discarded. But not by the Demon that drives the fear, by you.

I am learning to hate, and adding to the weight on my shoulders is my desire to save you.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Click for the Spoken ver here