In the jungle the Lion sleeps tonight

In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight.

What madness is this!? All they do is sleep. What of the mighty Hounds of the Baskervilles?! Are these not the mighty cousins of Cerberus that now guard a different Underworld?

Let me tell you a story. A story of mother Chunk

and the  Bandit son.

A stranger pair no kennel has ever bedded. Where mother Chunk would have you think her innocent and never a worry to pass her mind. Bandit son would rob you blind, if not for his lack of hands and pocket to put your loot.

No, this pack of squirrel chasers have never seen sleeping at night to be their sole option. For these Lions sleep tonight, tomorrow, today, and into the afternoon.

While mother Chunk will guard the perimeter and keep it safe for whatever treasures she deems guard worthy. Bandit son will guard, against me to ensure that whatever it is I deem to do is well under his purview to inspect. Much like Ma Parker when unsupervised the mother of the brood will lie upon my couch and plot her mischievous next move.

All the while Bandit son ensures that his toy squeaky pig squeaks no more. Poor porky, poor poor porky, he will be remembered. He will be missed.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle. The Lion sleeps tonight. What do this pack of hellhounds plot in their kennels at night? Should I rest easy? I have been told the story of mother Chunks retribution when she is displeased. It involved bed sheets and bodily fluids of which I will not go into. Oh the horror! Or the way the Bandit son demands attention and gets it. Even if he has to pay it to his self. For this one, self love was never something to be shy about. The echoing cries of "Stop that!" "You'll go blind!" "For the love of all that is milk bone that's your mother!" Still ring in my ears...

Man's best friend. Maybe I'm a cat person? Such innocent passengers out for a trip.

Vicious trained attack dogs longing for a squeaky toy to destroy! They're cute no doubt. But don't be fooled. They're up to something. They are the inspiration for "Something wicked this way comes." I suspect their owner has them trained for some nefarious doings. Some kind of canine skullduggery no doubt.

Or maybe it's like the movie Men in black, where the dog is the ring leader and the human is the one led and trained?

Who let the dogs out? This was the famous question in that infamous song. They are dogs right? But why do they grunt like pigs? Is that  one snoring? Or did someone rip a pillow case, slowly? I was not raised in the ways of canine. And I see now that my briefings were incomplete. Their bull dogs, but they're also French. That does explain a lot.

The strength of the pack is the strength of the Wolf. The strength of the Wolf is the strength of the pack. But who is the leader of the pack? When asked the question of the mother Chunk and owner Maxie,

all one gets is strange looks, drool, and grin. I'll let you decide which one gave which. Bandit son could not be reached for comment, he has a new toy gorilla to destroy.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the Lion sleeps tonight. 

Lucky bastard!!

 (In loving memory of poor Porky)